Saturday, morning.


Saturday, March 31, 2007

Terensu feels : like playing.

Kay, so yesterday, mass workout.
It was bad...nobody wanted to do, so I just fooled around.
Then Higher Chinese. Read a few passages and answered questions.
They were awesome passages. I had fun for that lesson.
Then, Lit. We were hoping that Benjamin and his group can save us from total destruction, and they succeeded! Now we can work on the presentation tomorrow, and I'll re-do the whole thing later tonight, when no-one is around to watch me...heh.
Math! Is fun. At first Mr Wong locked all the doors so the latecomers can't come in, then I think 4/2 helped us somehow.
At first Seetoh came and said, "Mr Wong I want to borrow visualiser!"
Mr Wong thought it was disrespectful and rejected him.
Then TingYi came along, stood at the window..."Hi Mr Wong."
The crowd went wild...in laughter. Lol.
Oh well, at least the three latecomers got in, and that's a good thing.
English was, well, so-so.
Mrs Lawrence taught me something I could really use to do my summary well.
But then, as the lesson progresses...I just took Bleach 18 and started to read. Heh.
Then, lesson ended and we decided to go to the gym, but NCC's Part A had to go to DeYi, so JiaHao and Geng An had to go, and then we decided that we might as well return the keys. (Yes, I'm skipping something that happened before that.)
Went back home and played FlyFF. WinterDarKnight is now lvl62, and wearing a full Blackine set. He is now an official Blade. Yay.

Okay, that's about all from me. I'll post somemore later in the night, perhaps.

I wish I can have the study group again...

En garde, Cranemachineries,
Terensu : WinterDarKnight.



Let it Rain.
09:49


Friday, Middle of the night.


Friday, March 30, 2007

Terensu feels : stuck with his body.

Bodies are a little too limiting in their capabilities.
They can't run too fast.
They can't jump too high.
They can't strike at turbo speeds with a weapon.
They can't exactly do magic.
They can't levitate and move around.

Oh heck, too much fantasies about what we can do without bodies.

Anyway, this morning I probably exerted myself a little too much. After PE I was feeling sleepy already.
I get a 10-minute timing for the run, though. Not too bad, but not too good either. Oh well.

As for the other lessons, I was doing okay. But when the extra lessons started, I started to close one eye to stop myself from sleeping, but I slept anyway.

As Lee Teck and Sing Ee said, I was winking and sleeping at the same time. *Wink**Zzz*. Lol.

I broke a window pane today. What bad luck. I'm really not going to kick the ball in class again. I'll force myself to draw a blade for real. Dang. Now I'll have to pay, again.

As if the stuff I have to pay for isn't much enough.

Oh well, it's getting really late. I'd better rest and get ready for tomorrow, or I'll never be able to concentrate.

Screw the Math homework, I'll do them tomorrow.

Sleep is essential, after all,
Terensu : WinterDarKnight.



Let it Rain.
00:08


Wednesday, Night,


Wednesday, March 28, 2007

Terensu feels : Hurt, then okay.

I regret not having enough sleep last night. I really should know my body's limits.
As much as I want to live differently, I still have to obey this body. Heh.
So, as expected, after recess my body started to give way to the desire to sleep.
Food + Humidity = Fatal.

I promise not to play soccer in class again when that...that...
I think the only word I can use now is 'thing',
I promise not to play soccer in class again when that thing is around.
Vulgarities + Hurtful words = Fatal.

After Math ended, I did much crap with HongYu while waiting for him to get ready to come over to my house. When we arrived, I bathed, and then went down to fetch two friends who joined our study group. After teaching Sotong so much about Chemistry formulas, and after learning about the center of rotation and teaching it to Minette, as well as teasing HongYu, alot, we went to Vista Point to eat together.
It was so silly of me to scald my hand while taking the soup. Dang.
HongYu was being teased this whole time...about eating speed and everything. Oh well.
Sotong made him angry. I don't know what happened, but HongYu was angered. I sure hope things will turn out fine.
HongYu told me something while I was walking with him, something that I can never understand. Heck, women are much harder to understand than Einstein's Law of Relativity.
Sent HongYu to the station, and Minette on her own back home, I come back here to do this blog.
Tease + going overboard = Fatal.

Fatality at its best,
Terensu : WinterDarKnight.



Let it Rain.
20:32


Tuesday, Morning.


Tuesday, March 27, 2007

Terensu feels : A little motivated.

Okay...so...there was some Internet problem yesterday that prevented my post from being delivered to the blog, so now, I'll have to post all over again.

The post yesterday was downright emo, and the Internet was right to prevent it from being on the blog. Oh well.

So anyways, I'm screwed for today. I'm supposed to hand in two essays...none of which I have actually completed. What luck. When will I ever hand in my homework on time?

So...oh...yesterday? I just felt plain useless.

I seem to be bad at almost every thing under the sun. Sports...singing...even drawing. I can't seem to draw people, cause' the face is so hard to draw out.

I even told myself to kill myself. Geez.

But...yea. Trust me to talk so much when I fought against myself in the battle of 'YOU ARE A FAILURE' and lost terribly.

So today, I'm just gonna fight it out. To see whether I can actually hand in my two essays. Heh.

If some other people can be motivated, why can't I? Haven't I been picking myself up all this time? Of course, with the help of my friends.

Yup, so today, I'll just try to sing something after school. I'll try Hawthorne Heights since my throat isn't that good...and I actually went off-tune when I started to try MCR.

Cough is never good when it comes to singing. Haha.

How many days to Wednesday? 1! Haha. I sure hope nothing pops up on Wednesday to stop me from enjoying it, cause' I won't be staying back in school.

Yea, that's about all from me this morning. Wish me luck in school.

Motivate,
Terensu : WinterDarKnight.



Let it Rain.
05:55


Sunday, Afternoon.


Sunday, March 25, 2007

Mood-de-rator : Heroic.

I am now blogging while my sister chats with her friend about birds. Heh.
Besides, I haven't blogged in so many days. Sorry guys. *If there are people who look through my blog anyway*
To those people who browse through my blog but didn't tag because of some reason, sorry, and I will try to blog more regularly next time.

Heck, there won't even be a next time.

So, this week has been a really busy one. Besides homework and stuff, we have this stupid file-checking which made a lot of us panic.
So, I just spend the weekends doing nothing but play FlyFF.
Go, WinterDarKnight, kill those accursed creatures.

Nevermind.

The pain in my lungs which started on Thursday died down considerably.
I'm still wondering about what happened to it. My guess was that water got into my lungs, but now, I'm having second thoughts about it.
I still haven't visited the doctor.
Like, c'mon, my family has great financial problems now, and I can't just go to the doctor's without worrying about my family.
I'll just have to live with this pain for awhile.

The Lit project has come to a complete halt because everyone was not enthusiastic enough for it. I'd better do something next week. I have to.

I sure hope next week would be a smooth one, cause' I'm really looking forward to Wednesday.
I'm going to teach two hot chicks about Math and Chemistry, who can resist? Haha.

Well, nah. I'm just really looking forward to meeting up with my primary school friend...it's been so long.

Oh well, she's done. I'd better go buy lunch and then start on my two essays. Heh.

No more FlyFF until next week. Damn.

Byebye,
Terensu : WinterDarKnight.



Let it Rain.
14:09


Monday, Night.


Monday, March 19, 2007

Mood-de-rator : Happy...*Cough*

I must have had a nightmare of sorts...cause' when I woke up I was feeling really ill...and I thought about 'lines' before I managed to wake up. It's hard to explain, and I couldn't remember anyway. Maybe I was being attacked by lines.

It was the first time I ever dreaded walking this long a distance to school. Man I shouldn't think that, it's good training. But no, they haven't even recovered yet. They still hurt a little when I unintentionally applied more force to a step. Guess I really overworked them this time.

This morning, I swear to improve on my skill in ties. I can never get them to turn out as good-looking ties.

The day went on pretty smoothly, basically.

CME today indicated that I'm intrinsic, that means that I rely not on material gains for my goals...

What's most important to me...

My family?

Friends?

Maybe it's the 'looking forward to a good relationship' thing again...urgh, got to concentrate on studies first.

What makes me happy...Love, obviously. Heh.

Anyways, I didn't do much when I got home, which is kinda expected from a lazy guy like me.

This 'Lazy' will get the better of me, though. I must start to work hard.

With the study group, and my own perseverance, I'm sure I'll be able to achieve something.

Get the 'O's over with, and it'll calm down until...the 'A's. Damn.

No Prozac, though,
Terensu : WinterDarKnight.



Let it Rain.
20:53


Friday, Night.


Friday, March 16, 2007

Mood-de-rator : ....

Speakers, busted a long time ago...
Earphones, completely busted a few hours ago...

A world without audio enjoyment...my soul is gonna leave my body...nooo......

"Spirits, are always, with you! Bwahahahahaha!!!"

Psh!

Anyway,

I see one big pile of homework before me.

I must...take up arms...soon...

Arm myself with a pen, a pencil in another, and supply myself with a good amount of paper and eraser.

Along with a "limited edition" must-win headband around my forehead. Bwahahahaa!!!

"You bee-tard...I will protect my brain, even if it costs me my life!"

Now now...most likely it's a death sentence right there for me, so, I should just work hard enough to finish all those papers and make it out of my room...alive!

I will seal up all the weaknesses within me for now - love, sloth, the desire to game(Oh, so painful!), the desire to eat, and all sorts of emotions that would deter me - and quietly do my homework...starting tomorrow.

I wonder if I could finish everything over the weekend, though.

Well, doesn't hurt to try.

Work hard, people,
Terensu : WinterDarKnight. (Cool? No?)



Let it Rain.
20:21


Wednesday, Evening.


Wednesday, March 14, 2007

Mood-de-rator : Cheerful.

Terensu, you lazy ass, you didn't post for 5 friggin' days!

...

Okay fine sorry...I got demoralised when nobody tagged on the tagboard, okay? Fine? Happy?

Okay never mind.

So I came back after the March Games, and actually felt a lot better.
March Games is a freaking depressing event.
I'm a bad player, something I keep denying...
But at least I tried, with oh-so-many wounds acquired.

There are many things I've learnt from this too...
* Never ever let your emotions be in control.
* Relax and let the energy flow.
* Oh, and learn to play properly before you ever go back to play again.

Okay, not many, but these are like...the basics of combat!

Okay, so...

I'm tired, burnt, and injured. Well...just scratches. Now that this is over, I shall stop my search for a girlfriend and actually work hard for my 'O's.

After the 'O's, I'm so getting a girlfriend.

Okay, back to being a DarKnight. =p

Good game to all,
Terensu The DarKnight. (Yay!)



Let it Rain.
17:39


Friday, Night


Friday, March 09, 2007

Can't type a lot...there's a sting every time I try.

I've been looking at the sky a lot today...and a lot of girls too.
And I injured myself.

Tomorrow's going to be a blast.

It really hurts,
Terensu The CraftKnight.



Let it Rain.
22:08


Wednesday, Night.


Wednesday, March 07, 2007

I'm not in a good mood.
I'm not too well, either.

Friends, although they were there to cheer me up, there's just too many stuff that makes things even worse than it already was.
One day, I shall just slip into oblivion. Start up social barriers, crush the computer, and study like there's no tomorrow.
I shall just be some emo nerd who dies of depression, instead of now, sitting here, wallowing in self-pity.

Wanting someone to be there for me isn't too much to ask, is it? I'm losing the battle, the battle against this life with an unknown variable that determines whether your life is screwed or not. I can't take much more.

As much as I want to die, I can't die. Not yet. I don't know why I have this will to live, maybe I still have some unfulfilled 'goals' which must be accomplished and then, I'll still die.

I'm tired.

Void,
Terensu The CraftKnight.



Let it Rain.
22:01


Tuesday, Night.


Tuesday, March 06, 2007

Mood-de-rator : At-choo! *Recoil*

Sometimes, when I lay down on my bed, I tend to think of things related to the opposite sex.
Things like sacrificing my life for someone and stuff.
Maybe I'm just plain foolish, but I know that deep down, I'll do it if I have to. I just will.

---

Okay nevermind, my main focus isn't about that, the focus is more on the opposite sex itself.
Sometimes, I just stop to think : Why? Why do I get attracted to them all the time? Pheromones, or just my own desire to actually care for one?
Well, I don't deny my want to care for a girl, nor my need to be cared for by a girl, but there's always this fact that things just can't be said aloud. We know it, and they do, too. But somehow...*sigh*...

Some things just can't be said, after all. That's how one-sided affection exists. But, somehow this feeling just makes me feel like a total coward. I take a liking for this girl, but I don't even take the initiative to get her number or anything. It just looks like plain cowardice to me. Take last Friday for example. I know I would like to get a number from any girl over at the bowling lane, and the 'truth or dare' game requires me to, but somehow, I just can't do it!

It must be fear. Fear to be rejected, fear to be scorned at, fear this, fear that. I know the girls I once liked, and probably still have a liking for, didn't really mean to turn down a guy with such means but, somehow, it just hurts. I know this is a case for anyone who has tried it. It works both ways.
---

Maybe I have to get more courage to go for it. It's what I did earlier this year. Gather courage, and let it all out at one go. I know I have a chance of getting hurt again, but still, if I don't give myself a chance, would the other party give me a chance? The answer is pretty obvious.

Convinced, but still hesitant,
Terensu The CraftKnight.



Let it Rain.
21:27


Monday, Afternoon


Monday, March 05, 2007

I had a dream before I woke up.
In this dream, there was a girl.
The familiar voice, the eyes, the face...just without the attitude.
There was food on the table. Did she cook that for me, or was it just something I bought on my own? I can't remember.
Why does she have to be the one I subconsciously think about? Why is she at the back of my head without me knowing it?

Why her?

---

I had a visual before I went to eat.
In this visual, there was another girl.
The familiar hair, the skin, the voice...just without the cheerfulness.
Her head was on the table. Was she crying, or was it just my imagination? I can't really tell.
Why did I walk away? Why didn't I stand near her and just console her with silence?

Why?

---

I listened to a song before I went off for school.
In this song, I got reminded of yet another girl.
The distinct voice, the eyes, the face...just without the familiarity.
She sits at her table. Was she feeling down, or was she feeling nothing at all? I'll probably never know.
Why did I add her? Why didn't I just consider her as invisible?

Why?

---

I had a memory while I was walking in the rain.
In this memory, there was a girl.
The beautiful voice, the smile, the hair...just without the closeness.
I lay my head on the table. Has she ever liked me, or was my affection one-sided? I really don't want to know.
Why did I confess? Why can't I just treat her like any other friend?

Why?

---

Losing faith,
Terensu The CraftKnight.



Let it Rain.
17:49


Saturday, Night.


Saturday, March 03, 2007

First of all, thanks Vernon, but I don't think I need a counselor. I think I can cope with things...for now.

---

Mood-de-rator : Happy. (Haven't been truly happy for a long time. I guess today has been great.)

Let's start things from yesterday.
Half - woke at 5.10am, brushed teeth, bathe, eat breakfast...usual routine.
Then went to the station and bought a bar of chocolate from 7-11 along the way.
JiaHao was a little late, and with him followed LiYi.
Oh well...rather wait than being waited for by others.
Boarded train...chatted...I forgot what we three chatted about. Lol.
Then took 169 from Ang Mo Kio to Bishan Park 1. It was still pretty dark...and cold too. >.<
Quite a few people arrived already, so I just left the two of them to do their bluetooth thing while I went to chat around.

-Fast Forward-

...yea...so it's all the boring warm-up and stuff like that...hell was I saying that I'll get top 10 again for this year.
So yea. Got to the starting line. I felt less nervous than usual. Maybe it was the extra confidence I was getting.
And so, we're off!
Over 10 boys took off before me and I can only watch them go further and further from me. Heck, I'll run my own race, you guys run yours.
The terrain was nice to run on. No bumps, no inclination, and best of all, no obstacles!
Running past the juniors who were walking wore me down a little. Haha, I actually have to zigzag my way thru' these little kiddies.
Around halfway through, I got tired, but I told myself, "You were having a lot of confidence just awhile ago, keep at confidence going and you would have won yourself. Remember Terence, you are not tired at all!"
With that, I kept on running, and actually kept my pace going.
I regretted not starting to sprint at the 900m mark. The finishing line was around 300m away. Dang.
Nevermind, at least I reached the finishing point without feeling any discomfort.

-Fast Forward-
So, I was going around shaking hands with the winners-to-be.
Venga, I hate you! Haha, nah you rock.
Grats ViTing, you got the same position as me!
Grats to you too, Hannah! 1st position is just nice for a President! =p
Grats to PanTao, KangMi, and YuZhu! Man, you guys sure can run!
Grats to TingYi, Adam, MingHan, Darren(s), and HongYu! HongYu, way to go man. You ran even though you started having pains halfway through.
Grats to all other winners for Cross Country this year!

After that, I met up with a few people of the class who were supposed to go to Kbox later. JiaHao, SingEe, Vernon, JieLing and JieMing walked across the road, with the thought of wanting to go to j8 first. In the end, they wanted a taxi.
So we waited...
And we waited...
And we waited...(Dumbass...can't you look at the people at the other end of the road?)
SingEe and I sang awhile (Haha) while the others tried in vain to flag down a taxi.
Alas...we walked to that end of the road.
JiaHao, JieLing, and SingEe the "Asshole" (According to Jieming), went off on a taxi, while me, JieMing and Vernon boarded the bus.
While on the bus, Vernon asked me about stuff. Vernon, I just need someone who cares about me and is willing to be there for me, okay? Okay.
Ate at LongJohnSilvers.
Then went to Dhoby Ghaut for games! Yay!
Initial D was so fun.
Had a few 'fights' with SingEe and JiaHao. I lost to SingEe twice just because I steered too early!
The last matchup of the day was when I used SingEe's Lancer against someone else's Trueno on Akina.
It was a close one.

-FastForward-

So in the end, I went home. Kbox was too expensive, Yishun was too boring, and I was just too tired. By the time it was 10, I just shut down the computer, and plop, I dropped dead on the bed.

Today...there's nothing much to talk about. It's just RuneScape for the whole day.
Rage 2 is a fun game. Lol.


Oh well...I wonder if anyone would be so kind to me that she'll defy all odds just to be by my side. I'd die for her is she did. Really, because that's the greatest gift I can ever get, to have her by my side.

Happiness is within you,
Terensu The CraftKnight.



Let it Rain.
22:02


Welcome

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Hi.
I'm Terence.
I'm 18.
My birthdate? 8th September.
If you need a friend to listen to you,I'll take the job.

Have fun,
NighT.

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