Monday, Night.
Monday, April 09, 2007
Terensu feels : phy-si-ca-li corroded. (How many days has this been happening?)
School is as usual, with the Lit presentation of the Friar and the Watch being beautifully captivating.
Okay, that would be suffigance for the school part.
Suffigance. XD
-I apologise for any depressing stuff I throw from here on-
It's been quite a while since this corrosion started.
Sometimes, it's so insignificant I just don't think much about it at all.
But sometimes, you'll just feel like taking up the role of an RPG character and hack away at the monsters.
Yes, hack away, Terence. Hack away at all the loneliness, all your sadness, and ONLY bring positive feelings towards your fellow friends.
...
It seems that I failed miserably.
I have been bugged. By all sorts of external factors. But what pisses me off most, is myself.
This inner desire is so strong, I think I can destroy myself if left alone for long enough.
What others say about "It's all in your head" and "Stop thinking about it, you're just desperate", they're all comforting words, I know, but to me I think it's all bull.
I just need to get a girl, love her, and get loved in return. That's all, plain and simple. I need that assurance right there in my face, that there is someone whom I can pour all of my emotions into. (If it doesn't piss her off)
Life just has to make things difficult, to make humans think that they've attained it, only to know that their hard work was all a waste of time.
Why make it so difficult?
And you, Terensu, you dumbass. You can't even stand up, walk up, and confess to the girl you like. You have been a freaking coward for so many years, and you know what, I'm getting tired of you. If you can't just stand up for what you want you should just go and die, end of story. Why torture yourself over one person?
And you, Terence. You know that love can't be forced, and you just had to overdo things. I know it's what you need, but guess what? No girl needs you right now. Maybe there are, but they're freakign going to shut up so you won't go to them. You die too, Terence. You're not fit to even make a fool of yourself in class.
...
I know it's something I'll never give up on, so I can't say I give up, but I'm really tired. I just want to balance out my life. What's wrong with that?
Never mind,
Terensu : WinterDarKnight.
Let it Rain.
21:24